Monday, October 15, 2007
♥ New Findings from...... a bunch of forgotten keys!
This happend quite some time ago, I was noting it down in my head that - Yes. I'm going to blog it down.
And once again, procastination and 'businest' had won the war.
Luckily, I suddenly remember this when travelling to work this morning (while squeezing in the super packed train). Dunno when the 'inspiraion' strike me... maybe when you are standing and slping you get inspired or sudden recalling of things.
Here it goes...
I was happily on my way home (finally, I can go home straight after work! I had been going to sch and lessons etc.. so much that I REALLY missed going home straight from work even to just rot in-front of TV. Trust me, it's a luxury to do so. Maybe the older we are, the more we attached we feel to home?), packing my dinner from the foodcourt near the station. Looking forward to a GREAT evening to just eating my pack dinner infront of the TV, and had a good bathe before heading off for my student's home. See? The very nice picture painted in my head.
After I alighted from the bus, I started digging for the key 'to my happy evening' . As expected, I forgot to bring it out. =( The feeling was like, you forgot to claim your to-to wining. Grrrhh.... Made a call for my dad to rescue me and was told he will come back asap. Base on my understanding of my WHOLE family - we are the 'late-comer'. I anticipated a 30 min wating time DESPITE the fact that I told him I having a tuition later.
Felt..... SO near yet SO far! Decided to wait at the void deck at my house. Guess what, it took me 5 YEARS + to realise that there is no stone table (whatever you call it) at my void deck. That explains why I ALWAYS see those teens squarting ard! ERm.... BEST! The only banches and table ard are somewhere around the park (which is directly behind the flat). But it's a NO No for me, who on earth with a saint/sense mind ( I mean gal, if its guy who care where you sitting at night) would want to sit there alone at 7pm when the sky is getting darker by every minute. And its such an isolated area, there wun be a single soul ard, not to mention NICE soul around should I shout till my lungs is out.
And so, I 'wonder' round the void deck walking, and searching for just SOMETHING to SIT! Damn.... was so tired and no place to sit plus INSECTS, MOSQUITOES, SKIRTS and HUNGRY stomach with my packed DINNER (but can't eat). That's a 30 min hell torture!!!! Really felt shitty!!
Walk, and more walkings, and still no bench or stone table or ANYTHING to sit. Walk all the way back to playground and so GRATEFUL to find benches there!!! Sit on it and felt WONDERFUL! But, ya... irritating insect and mosquitoes still around. Felt so helpless and look like a fool. Everyone alighting from the bus would walked pass the playground and saw me - the stupid fool sitting there and wondering what she is doing there at this hour. And I watched their back view with envy knowing that they are reaching home sweet home in less than 10 min.
BUT, I realise that it's also a time where I can really STOP. Able to sit down in a well, so call "park like place" with the playground infront of me but no kids to watch (atlest if there are some kids playing that will be great, guess they had gone home for DINNER!) And watching the sun setting, dawn arriving - what a "change shift" thought. And I start to run through my mind digging out stuff that I needa think through. - Aparently, there had been lotsa issue in my mind queueing up for such "time off" occassion that I can think it through. And so I tried to think through all, questioning on the action I have done so far, right or wrong, good or bad, moving on or not, am I in the right direction or I needa re-adjust my direction, the path clear? Should I start on something, should I start to look at things in another perspective, and change my opinion on certain thing, identifying my uncertainty, where to find the ans to my questions, etc... Wow... a whole lot of thoughts!!! Guess the eveing, the sun setting, the wind, the quiet playground (apart from the ppl who walked passed), had made it quite a perfect place for thoughts and reflection. And I guess that's what everybody needs!
Things happen for a reason.
By forgetting to bring out my keys, in return, I gain a 20 min (cancelled away my 10min bench hunting time spent, settleing time, and PHOTO taking) of thoughts and reflections. Well it's funny that the thoughts was so clear at that moment. But now, somehow, I seem to forget what I had set my mind on doing! I need another such moment.....
Not to forget the findings : lotsa mosquitoes, no benches at void deck, time to trim those plant that was dangling on my head (I was worring a caterpillar will fall on me), playground is in good condition, nice design and fun to play (I would have play the monkey bar if not for the fact that i am wearing skirt n ppl walkin pass every few minutes - too open to do such childplay) oh well one more LITTLE things, the ice-cream man who came!
Small little things happening around where I stay but I took 5 years to notice them.....
And once again, procastination and 'businest' had won the war.
Luckily, I suddenly remember this when travelling to work this morning (while squeezing in the super packed train). Dunno when the 'inspiraion' strike me... maybe when you are standing and slping you get inspired or sudden recalling of things.
Here it goes...
I was happily on my way home (finally, I can go home straight after work! I had been going to sch and lessons etc.. so much that I REALLY missed going home straight from work even to just rot in-front of TV. Trust me, it's a luxury to do so. Maybe the older we are, the more we attached we feel to home?), packing my dinner from the foodcourt near the station. Looking forward to a GREAT evening to just eating my pack dinner infront of the TV, and had a good bathe before heading off for my student's home. See? The very nice picture painted in my head.
After I alighted from the bus, I started digging for the key 'to my happy evening' . As expected, I forgot to bring it out. =( The feeling was like, you forgot to claim your to-to wining. Grrrhh.... Made a call for my dad to rescue me and was told he will come back asap. Base on my understanding of my WHOLE family - we are the 'late-comer'. I anticipated a 30 min wating time DESPITE the fact that I told him I having a tuition later.
Felt..... SO near yet SO far! Decided to wait at the void deck at my house. Guess what, it took me 5 YEARS + to realise that there is no stone table (whatever you call it) at my void deck. That explains why I ALWAYS see those teens squarting ard! ERm.... BEST! The only banches and table ard are somewhere around the park (which is directly behind the flat). But it's a NO No for me, who on earth with a saint/sense mind ( I mean gal, if its guy who care where you sitting at night) would want to sit there alone at 7pm when the sky is getting darker by every minute. And its such an isolated area, there wun be a single soul ard, not to mention NICE soul around should I shout till my lungs is out.
And so, I 'wonder' round the void deck walking, and searching for just SOMETHING to SIT! Damn.... was so tired and no place to sit plus INSECTS, MOSQUITOES, SKIRTS and HUNGRY stomach with my packed DINNER (but can't eat). That's a 30 min hell torture!!!! Really felt shitty!!
Walk, and more walkings, and still no bench or stone table or ANYTHING to sit. Walk all the way back to playground and so GRATEFUL to find benches there!!! Sit on it and felt WONDERFUL! But, ya... irritating insect and mosquitoes still around. Felt so helpless and look like a fool. Everyone alighting from the bus would walked pass the playground and saw me - the stupid fool sitting there and wondering what she is doing there at this hour. And I watched their back view with envy knowing that they are reaching home sweet home in less than 10 min.
BUT, I realise that it's also a time where I can really STOP. Able to sit down in a well, so call "park like place" with the playground infront of me but no kids to watch (atlest if there are some kids playing that will be great, guess they had gone home for DINNER!) And watching the sun setting, dawn arriving - what a "change shift" thought. And I start to run through my mind digging out stuff that I needa think through. - Aparently, there had been lotsa issue in my mind queueing up for such "time off" occassion that I can think it through. And so I tried to think through all, questioning on the action I have done so far, right or wrong, good or bad, moving on or not, am I in the right direction or I needa re-adjust my direction, the path clear? Should I start on something, should I start to look at things in another perspective, and change my opinion on certain thing, identifying my uncertainty, where to find the ans to my questions, etc... Wow... a whole lot of thoughts!!! Guess the eveing, the sun setting, the wind, the quiet playground (apart from the ppl who walked passed), had made it quite a perfect place for thoughts and reflection. And I guess that's what everybody needs!
Things happen for a reason.
By forgetting to bring out my keys, in return, I gain a 20 min (cancelled away my 10min bench hunting time spent, settleing time, and PHOTO taking) of thoughts and reflections. Well it's funny that the thoughts was so clear at that moment. But now, somehow, I seem to forget what I had set my mind on doing! I need another such moment.....
Not to forget the findings : lotsa mosquitoes, no benches at void deck, time to trim those plant that was dangling on my head (I was worring a caterpillar will fall on me), playground is in good condition, nice design and fun to play (I would have play the monkey bar if not for the fact that i am wearing skirt n ppl walkin pass every few minutes - too open to do such childplay) oh well one more LITTLE things, the ice-cream man who came!
Small little things happening around where I stay but I took 5 years to notice them.....
5:31 PM
